I often think. My mind is almost never off. At first, I felt that this was a curse. But, it’s a strength.
The key to thinking is not letting your mind take something and run away with it. Like, run away and not come back. Often times, I feel like I have to tie a leash to some thoughts to ensure they do not escape and wreak havoc in my life.
A common line that I have heard in my life is, “Danae, you’re overthinking it.” I absolutely hate it when someone says I overthink. Maybe they are under thinking it? Where’s the logic in their debate?
How many times has someone told you that you overthink, when you feel you are being completely sound in your judgement?
I sound stuck in my ways. I sound unable to hear feedback for my way of processing issues. I’m not. I’m just being logical in my own way of processing. So, what’s the best approach to address someone who is gifted in the arts of overthinking? Keep reading, I’ll get there.
There has definitely been a journey for how my thought process has evolved over time. How my overactive mind has served me over the years. I assume that is relatable for most people who lay awake at night thinking of all the solutions for life’s problems. Here’s some tips to help tame your mind a little bit.
1.) Keep Emotions out of it
The best way to protect your feelings from your overactive thinking ways, try your best to keep irrational emotions out of it. Not saying don’t process them. But, when you keep your irrational thoughts separate and process them separately- it makes a world of difference.
2.) Give Yourself Time to Process
There are instances where you can just say how you feel, and what your decision is. Other times, you’re going to need time to process. Allow yourself a safe space within your mind to do such. Think it out.
3.) Gather Evidence
Yes, become a detective. If you absolutely need the feedback of others- ask your few closest friends. Or family.
4.) Trust Your Gut
9 times out of 10, I follow my gut instincts. It’s the feeling you get when you know something is off about a situation. Sometimes, it is hard to pinpoint what it is. The important part, is knowing when to act on that feeling. If you let that feeling linger, anxiety builds.
Now, how do you approach someone who you consider is an over thinker?
Don’t tell them they’re overthinking. Ask them how they arrived at certain conclusions or how they are thinking a process through. Understanding their more in-depth approach to figuring stuff out will make them feel valued.
I can speak from experience. When I used to get worked up, and felt no one understood my ways- I would visibly become flustered, start stuttering and not be able to form sentences.
As a proud ‘over thinker’ with an overactive mind, life’s too short to not think of all the possibilities.
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Danae Decker 